Well, off the top of my head, I would try any combination of the following:

1. On highend there is a new plugin called: "GLU3d" I think that will help you create your realistic splashing effects.

2. For your ripples, there is a shader, a melscript, and a plugin that can do this on Highend as well.

(sorry Kev

3. And lastly, there is a tutorial on Alias|Wavefront's "How-To" section on how to make water ripples in a trough that I think would help you get started.

I'm at work right now, so, I can't get you the direct links at the moment, but if you look for them, you'll find 'em

Good luck, and let's see it when you're done!