Cool....it kinda works now. Ummm.....except the texture is all messed up. Am I missing something here? How do I align the texture so that it stretches evenly across the face?

I have a horrible feeling I'm missing out on some of the theory behind this.

BTW, just wanna say thanks to everyone. This is my one-stop-shop for asking (stupid) questions on Maya. Pity its so damned difficult!

Rage_Matrix