can not give you an answer to all of it but maybe to some.

first:
I heard of this kind of selection by painting called maya artisan tool but didn´t try it myself until now. one sort of selection you did not mention is -> select a face and press < or > on your keyboard. that will extend/reduce the selection.

third:
why don´t you simply select a face and scale it?

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EDIT: oops I was too slow.. forget this poor posting.
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