Hi ppl, thanx for you help but i actually fixed it.. YAY!

i fixed it by making a brand new glass material... and by some miracle of god all my particles and glow effects show up through this glass.

i cant say i understand why this new glass works and the old one doesnt... it just does!

I changed some of the glass attributes...
colour from grey to black
spec colour from white to grey
cosine power from 20 to 70

the other changes were rather minor

anyway ive got no idea why it works but it does.. so im happy