Introduction to Maya - Rendering in Arnold
This course will look at the fundamentals of rendering in Arnold. We'll go through the different light types available, cameras, shaders, Arnold's render settings and finally how to split an image into render passes (AOV's), before we then reassemble it i
# 1 08-07-2008 , 02:41 AM
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physics joke

heres a physics joke, you may recognize it from big bang theory

There is this farmer who is having problems with his chickens. All of the sudden, they are all getting very sick and he doesn't know what is wrong with them. After trying all conventional means, he calls a biologist, a chemist, and a physicist to see if they can figure out what is wrong. So the biologist looks at the chickens, examines them a bit, and says he has no clue what could be wrong with them. Then the chemist takes some tests and makes some measurements, but he can't come to any conclusions either. So the physicist tries. He stands there and looks at the chickens for a long time without touching them or anything. Then all of the sudden he starts scribbling away in a notebook. Finally, after several gruesome calculations, he exclaims, 'I've got it! But it only works for spherical chickens in a vacuum.'

I bet a lot of you dont get it

ill post the answer later

# 2 08-07-2008 , 04:39 AM
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I'm a compsci and logicomp major who gave up on physics at the end of 7th form... so ya... it sounds like its meant to be funny but i have no idea what youre trying to get at (but i'll still laugh anyway :p)user added image

# 3 08-07-2008 , 04:53 AM
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OK, after much thinking, which resulting in my brain hurting a lot, I have concluded that there are seven possible, yet very unlikely possibilities:

1. The universe was not created from the primeval waters of chaos, or by some guy in the sky, but by a chicken from an alternate dimension that spawned our universe when it imploded.

2. The chicken went supernova. Depending on the mass of the chicken, you may end up with a neutron star or a black hole.

3. The physicist, inspired by the chickens, discovered the Tau Particle, which creates "anomalous" phenomena. I for one bow before our Combine overlords! :bow:

4. The chickens were influenced by alien spacecraft. Hence the vacuum. user added image

5. There is a new demonic/science cult around. Sacrificing chickens to the four prime evils, Diablo, Baal, Mephesto and Einstein involves violent decompression in a vacuum chamber.

6. Our knowledge of science is flawed. Chickens are the primary constituents of all matter in the universe. Sub-way-chicken-rolls are what chickens are made from, an analogy to neutrons, photons and electrons.

7. That new particle accelerator/colliding thingy in Europe did this. I told them the world would end when they switched in on! user added image

I feel that we are nowhere closer.


C. P. U. Its not a big processor... Its a series of pipes!
# 4 08-07-2008 , 05:07 AM
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ok ill tell you

theoretical physics only works in a vacuum with geometrical objects
its funnier every time i hear it
:blush:
:lmao:
:lmao:
:lmao:
:lmao:

# 5 08-07-2008 , 05:12 AM
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lol! user added image


I have no idea what just happened... but lol anyways...


So the chickens were affected by dark matter right?


C. P. U. Its not a big processor... Its a series of pipes!
# 6 08-07-2008 , 05:38 AM
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oh i think i get it....

everything the physicist did was analytical results and didn't take into account any of the other forces and stuff that come from emperical results

i hope i confuzzled everyone else too :attn:

# 7 08-07-2008 , 06:53 AM
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# 8 08-07-2008 , 08:14 AM
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am i one of the only people who actually got it?:p


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# 9 08-07-2008 , 08:48 AM
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It would seem so

(did you get it before reading the answer?) (if you did bravo)

# 10 08-07-2008 , 10:39 AM
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yeah, actually, lol

(and to think I failed chemistry :p)


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# 11 08-07-2008 , 10:41 AM
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Ooohhh... smart people jokes!

That was pretty funny! (and yes I had to read the answer :headbang: )

I've got a proggy joke for ya:

How many OOP's (Object Oriented Programmers) does it take to change a light bulb?











.... Non, they simply call the changeBulb() method user added image


www.stevenegan-cgi.com

"Your weapons are no match for ours! People of Mars, surrender!"
"Um, this isn't Mars. This is Earth."
"Earth? Earth-with-nuclear-weapons Earth?"
"Yes."
[long pause] "Friend!!"
# 12 08-07-2008 , 11:44 AM
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Im sorry but thats awful......

# 13 08-07-2008 , 02:23 PM
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.................................................. .


i actually get that one...

# 14 08-07-2008 , 07:04 PM
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errrr..??? i think you guys should get some more sunshine or up the prozac !!??? user added image

heres another physics joke

a man sets a net to catch a fish but snares a duck
a mantis hunts an insects but is itself set upon by a bird
machinations within machinations
changes happen beyond changes
so how can cleverness and wit be relied upon

whats it mean??


take it easy and life will be easy
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